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Divorce & Separation from a High Conflict Spouse in Alberta

Hours Updated onMarch 25, 2023 Categories AB
divorce & separation from a high conflict Spouse in Vancouver British Columbia

Separating Yourself From a High Conflict Spouse in Alberta

Does My Spouse Have a High Conflict Personality?

  1. Is your spouse rigid and uncompromising?
  2. Does your spouse have difficulty accepting and healing from loss?
  3. Do negative emotions dominate their thinking?
  4. Does your spouse have an inability to reflect on their own behavior?
  5. Does your spouse have difficulty empathizing with others?
  6. Is your spouse preoccupied with blaming others (mostly you)?
  7. Does your spouse avoid any responsibility for the problem or the solution?

If you answered ‘yes’ to most of these questions, then your spouse may have a High Conflict Personality. According to the High Conflict Institute, these are some of the patterns you see in a person with a high conflict personality. 

If this describes the person you are divorcing or separating from, then it is important that you learn the tools you will need to navigate through your separation from them as skillfully as possible. This is important as these types of spouses tend to engage in extreme behaviors which can harm you, and most importantly your children. 

Divorce and separation from a high conflict spouse in Alberta

What is considered “extreme behaviour” in a high conflict separation?

As stated by the High Conflict Institute, such extreme behaviours: 

“…include shoving or hitting, spreading rumors or outright lies, trying to have obsessive contact and keep track of your every move – or refusing to have any contact at all, even though you may be depending on them to respond. Many of their extreme behaviors are related to losing control over their emotions, such as suddenly throwing things or making very mean statements to those they care about the most. Other behaviors are related to an intense drive to control or dominate those closest to them, such as hiding your personal items, keeping you from leaving a conversation, threatening extreme action if you don’t agree, or physically abusing you.”

Some of these spouses will have such lack of control over their behaviours, they will include your children in their ‘war’ against you. Divorcing or separating from a spouse with a High Conflict Personality can be especially difficult, and filled with such turmoil it makes it hard to fathom an end to what some of my clients have described as a ‘never-ending nightmare’. 

Why is managing conflict so important?

The biggest reason to skillfully learn to manage your interactions with your high conflict spouse is to protect your child or children.

Research, time and time again, has made it very clear that children exposed to conflict between parents are at high risk numerous negative outcomes, which include emotional and behavioral difficulties, drug and alcohol dependency in later life, trouble with interpersonal relationships, problems settling and achieving at school, sleep difficulties, and poorer health.

Coming up from us, is a series (Three Bees) of three different techniques, methods or tools you may use to manage your interactions with your high conflict personality spouse. 

We currently have three offices across Alberta — Edmonton, Calgary, and Red Deer. We serve the entire province of Alberta (and BC). We also have the infrastructure to work with any of our clients virtually — even the furthest regions of Alberta.

Call 1 (855) 892-0646 (toll free) to get routed to the best office for you or contact us online for general inquiries.

We also have a dedicated intake form to help you get the ball rolling. Our intake team will review your specific case and advise you on the next steps to take as well as what to expect moving forward. That’s the best way to schedule an appointment

Our offices are generally open 8:30 a.m.—4:30 p.m., Mon—Fri.

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Shivaan de Silva - Spectrum Family Law

Shivaan de Silva

FAMILY LAWYER

Whether you are a spouse considering divorce, but needs to consider the implications on your family business, or are a co-parent who needs to consider the practical effects of accepting a potential job offer in another jurisdiction, Shivaan is eager to listen and help you consider what legal options you may have available.

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A methodology of alternative dispute resolution

You control the outcome that works best for you – rather than a judge who hears your case.

We are expert family law litigators, however we do so with an understanding of the emotional stress that litigation can sometimes have on our client and the existing family unit.

Our team will advise you on the benefits of alternative dispute resolution, including mediation and arbitration. These alternative methods empower the parties to negotiate an outcome that accounts for their respective interests in a non-adversarial setting – minimizing disruption to your family.

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  • Areas of Family Law
    • Divorce
      • Divorce Mediation
      • Collaborative Law
      • Uncontested Divorce
      • Joint Divorce
    • Child Custody
    • Child Support
    • Surrogacy & Fertility Law
    • Spousal Support
    • Maintenance Enforcement Program
    • Marital Property Division
    • Common Law Separation
    • Marriage Agreements
      • Cohabitation Agreements
      • Prenuptial Agreement
      • Separation Agreements
    • Real Estate for Families
    • Coaching & Self-Representation
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    • Meet Your Team
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    • About Us
    • Awards & Recognition
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    • Separation Info
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